Lucifer Takes A Mate

Something else that has been showing more bark than bite lately is the dialogue between the Republican establishment and the current candidates. Potential Trump vice president nominee, and fellow Orange party member, John Boehner, jumped on the bruise The Cruz movement this week. If the fate of our country, and the perception of the rest of the world were not issues, it would be laughable. As it is, it’s scary for all.

What I’m talking about is that John Boehner, former friend to everyone not named Obama, came out this week and described Ted Cruz as “Lucifer in the flesh”. In a speech at Stanford university, Boehner stated, “I have Democrat friends and Republican friends. I get along with almost everyone, but I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life.”  Now from a contrarian point of view, that’s pretty high praise for someone who wants to be perceived as an outsider. You just know that Boehner has dealt with some really difficult personalities over the years, and to be called out as the number one SOB of them all is quite a prize. The Cruz did try to damage control the statement by pointing out that his inability to get along with any of his constituents in Congress just verified his “outsider” bona fides. I don’t think that I’ve heard a denial from Cruz about the Lucifer part.

To their credit, a group of Satanists have gone on record as saying, “Satanists do not “want” Cruz and that he “is everything opposite of what we represent.”  I guess you’ve hit rock bottom when the Satanists won’t take you in. There are certainly links here for the Biblically minded. The story of Revelations tells of a false prophet who is believed to be the second coming of Jesus. It is widely stated that Cruz’s wife, Heidi, heard the voice of God telling her that Ted would be the next President. Ted used God’s intervention to explain his win in the Iowa primary. Ted’s Dad is out preaching to anyone that will listen that The Cruz is divined to win the Presidency to turn the tables on the wealthy. Sounds like the setup to a disaster movie where a guy becomes the most powerful man in the world and then turns out to be an absolute nutcase.

To offset the damage to his rep done by Boehner’s statements, and the rather sound beating in the primaries by The Donald, The Cruz has decided to go all in. The Cruz announced his running mate, Carly Fiorina. That is if Cruz is lucky enough to win the Republican nomination. I guess The Cruz is confident The Rapture will come sometime after the convention and that he won’t be one of those “called up”. I would assume that his call to Heaven would be sufficient to get him out of the hair of the rest of us mere mortals. Although, if he is the “Second Coming”, I guess he gets to chose what he wants to do most. Take his seat at the right hand of God, or be President of the United States. Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Decisions like picking one of the most mean hateful women on the planet as your running mate. The fact that she said yes to the request should have scared Cruz. This is someone who is willing to get down and roll in the mud for a delusional Bible thumper. Someone who is willing to be Cruz’s bulldog for the chance that he’ll get bumped off and she’ll get to step in. Like I said before, if the fate of our country, and the perception of the rest of the world were not issues, we’d be having a good chuckle. As it is, it’s scary, on a Biblical scale.

 

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