It’s The Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown

BudLiteGood morning, y’all. A cloudy day in the mountains that is not delivering enough rain. Seems like if it is going to be overcast all day that it should just go ahead and rain, as opposed to the occasional drizzle we’ve been experiencing. I know the plants are appreciating the moisture, I just wish it would rain and get it over with.

I guess my impatience for things dragging out is evidenced in other areas as well. Leopards don’t change their spots, and old leopards are less inclined I guess. The point that I’m obliquely arriving to is the ongoing relationship I have with the Right Reverend Dale E. Bread. His brood has been ensconced in Number Thirty Nine for a few months now. While he has caught up on his rent, he continues to be a general sore spot for me. I will admit he did me a favor by coming to my parole hearing and giving me a character reference, but that could have gone either way. I guess I should just be thankful for the good outcome.

There are two things that continue to grind my gears with the Right Reverend. First off is his continued Lothario ways. He continues to sneak out about two AM several times a week to visit Ms. Anita Goodman in Number Fifty Three. I’ve not heard any complaints from any of the other tenants, so, I guess I should hold my peace. It’s just that I have the evidence of his trysts on the TackyToo surveillance system, and it has become commonplace. If there’s one thing I learned from my Momma, it was not to be “common”. Watching the Right Reverend sneak out to “lay hands” on Ms. Goodman has become as common as watching the possums tear into Yuri Stinkherr’s garbage cans looking for whatever cabbage based food is emitting the odor that only possums could be attracted to. Possums and the Stinkherrs, I guess.

The second item up for discussion is the mistaken belief that rent at TackyToo includes a day care service for the Right Reverend’s brood of seven miscreants. If I’m being truthful, the children under the age of four should probably not be labeled as miscreants, yet. That’s three out of the seven that there is still hope that they will become productive members of society someday. I believe the die has already been cast for the older four. The eldest, Devin, is just waiting for his turn on “America’s Most Wanted“. I foresee the day when Mulva or I will be interviewed on Channel 11 and we’ll be forced to say, “we never saw it coming, he was always such a sweet child”. For my part I’m saving the real dirt for Lester Holt and “Forty Eight Hours”. Why give it away to Channel 11 when we can get recompensed by a network?

Anyway, Date Night turned out to be date night for the Bread’s. Mulva agreed to keep the little hellions while Dale and Alva went out on the town. I guess I should be happy that the Right Reverend is in the chips again and can afford to take his wife out for a night on the town. Since The Full Gospel Original Church of God has moved to the “Crystal Palace” in Blairsville, Reverend Bread has been shepherding the flock at the old location. Enough of the old timers have stayed behind to warrant keeping the old church open. I hear the Right Reverend has still not gotten fully back to speed after his incident, but that he is showing more vigor in his preaching. I guess that’s a good thing.

Since I didn’t feel inclined to get too invested in the date night movie, I opted to watch the televised version of “It’s The Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown”. Way more kid friendly, with less questions asked. For an Easter themed movie I could have gone with “The Greatest Story Ever Told”. It would have provided many opportunities to point out the realtionship of crime and punishment to the older children. It might have put the “fear of God in them”, but in a different way than is normally intended. It’s better that they think that Easter is about a beagle and a bird named Woodstock than nailing somebody up to a cross. At least in my opinion.

Download PDF

Leave a Reply